January 20, 2003

By Michael Strickland

Bring on the Mayhem

San Diego authorities are taking no chances when it comes to security precautions for Super Bowl XXXVII. A seven-mile no-fly-zone around Qualcomm Stadium will be enforced by military aircraft. National Guardsmen will protect the fuel tank farms to the north of the Q. No one without a ticket to the Big Game will be allowed anywhere near the stadium parking lot, much less the stadium itself.

Such precautions are prudent in a post-9/11 world. A stadium filled with 70,000 people, hosting an event seen live on television by tens of millions more, would make a tempting target for any terrorist. It's reassuring to know that the authorities are doing all they can to prevent any threat from al Qaeda or other such groups.

But have they prepared for the onslaught of the godless infidels from the north?

As one would expect, Raider fans created mayhem in the streets of Oakland last night when their team defeated the Tennessee Titans to win the AFC Championship and a trip to the Super Bowl. Rabid crowds ignited a large bonfire in the street, threw rocks and bottles, and smashed a number of store windows in "celebration" of their team's first Super Bowl appearance since 1984.

These are the same fans who will raid America's Finest City this week.

Despite hating the Raiders as only a loyal Charger fan can, I confess I was excited to see the Raiders beat the Titans. Rich Gannon is one of the best quarterbacks in the league, and—unlike his fans—he's got a lot of class. He deserves a shot at the Vince Lombardi Trophy. Plus, a face-off against ex-Raider head coach Jon "Chucky" Gruden will ratchet up the intensity level.

But if Raider fans celebrate by lighting fires and breaking windows, what will they do if their team loses? Apparently we're doomed to either a little riot or a big riot. Let's hope the authorities make allowances for the AFC Axis of Evil in their preparations.

 

©2003 Michael Strickland ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

Daily Chuckle:

Eat Right, Exercise... Die Anyway

What is "The Daily Strick"?

I have long called myself a writer, but too often I don't do what a writer must do daily: write. So you, dear reader, are the beneficiary of my resolution to make a positive change in at least one area of my life. Every single day of this new year, I will write something, anything, and post it here. It is my intention to use this daily exercise to jump-start my too-long-dormant creative energies, and perhaps generate some worthwhile material this year. Hopefully you will find at least an occasional amusement or insight in my daily musings.

Today's Column
Send a Comment

Previously...

1/19: Pigskin Ponderings
1/18: More Stupid Lawsuits
1/17: Finding My Passion
1/16: Gulf War Memories
1/15: Meet the New Boss
1/14: Man's Other Best Friend
1/13: Sea of Fire
1/12: Back to the Books
1/11: America's Finest Climate
1/10: Sunshine in a Bottle
1/9: What Would Jesus Drive?
1/8: Southwestern Sojourn
1/7:
Wheel of Fortune
1/6:
Class Warfare
1/5: Very Large Dream
1/4:
The New Nuclear Age
1/3:
Going Solo
1/2:
New Year, Old Cave
1/1: All Things End

Like what you've read?
Find more good reading on

In Association with Amazon.com

(and support future Daily Stricks!)